My life in Office Space

It wasn't more than a few hours ago that I was told overtime for the week was immanent. However, as I now sit at my desk with just a little under an hour left in the day, I find myself taskless. So in the mean time I have been sitting here reminiscing on the similarities between my everyday life and that of Peter from Office Space. Here is what I came up with:

-I work for Infocom Group, Peter works for Innetech -- Both of these companies have names that are completely generic and nobody (including their employees) really know what they do.

-I sit in a cubicle next to someone who I consider to be very much like a Milton Waddums (we'll call him SB). SB is one of the most intriguing people that I have met; definitely a one of a kind, definitely strange, and definitely highly intelligent. You know that kind of intelligence where your social interaction skills fall to the wayside.

-Then there is Josh, he's kind of like my Lawrence (Mullet guy, also known as the "2 chicks at the same time" guy). I mean, of course he doesn't have a mullet, or a bad porn-moustache, or speak with a Texan accent; but he is from a trailer park, wears a cowboy hat, and ogles boobs... So that makes him my Lawrence.

-The are even aspects of Lisa that remind me of Jennifer Aniston's character Joanna. For example, when Peter is explaining the money scheme to her she says: even if he is only taking fractions of a cent per transaction it's still stealing.

Lisa definitely keeps me in check if I try to rationalize doing anything that might be

slightly immoral.

-As for Lumberg; my boss here at Infocom is no where as 'off' as Lumberg (although it would be more interesting if he was). However, he is really passive-aggressive to a point of being really uncomfortable. I once saw him walk passed my cube, across the office, call our supervisor (Sam) into his office and close the door. After 5 minutes or so, Sam emerged walked over to the person sitting next to me and said "you have to move your car to the street;

the spots in the lot are reserved for the higher-ups".

Seriously, he had to walk past us and across the office to tell our supervisor to ask Jeremy to move his car... Yeeeeeaaaah (in a Lumberg Voice).

-Right now I have five different bosses; that's right 5! I'll even name them for you:

Jim, Cindy, Torry, Tim, and Sam.

Because I have been floating between the research dept and marketing dept I

have to answer to all of them. Literally, when I do something wrong I could hear

about it 5 times (although in all honesty it's usually only twice).

-Sometimes I covet my Stapler.

-I always show up 15 minutes late and head in the side door where no one will see me.

-I usually zone out at my computer for the first hour of the day, then another hour after lunch.

-I mutter under my breath about not getting my paycheck or a piece of the company-bought birthday cake all the time.

- often I think about "two chicks at the same time".

-I have yelled at our office copier:

"PC load letter? What the fuck does that mean?"

-Sometimes, I sit in my car on the way to work listening to gangsta rap. But when an young black man gets close to my car I turn down the music, roll up the windows, and lock the door.

-I wake up everyday of the week with "a case of the Mondays."

-Here's the kicker... I have TPS reports! I'm not talking about something like a TPS report, or something that reminds me of a TPS report, or something named similar to a TPS report... I talking about a fucking TPS REPORT. Every day, before I leave, I sit at my desk and fill out a report stating what I did for the day (TPS: Total Productivity Spreadsheet). I have these fuckers to fill out every day.

So there it is, my life in Office Space. Man, Mike Judge is my hero if, for nothing else, creating a world that so much of us can relate to. If you haven't seen the movie in a while, I highly recommend you rent it!