The Kackistocrat's Handbook for the Recently Deceased.

My childhood was typical--summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we’d make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds; pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of 14 a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles . There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it’s breathtaking…I suggest you try it -- Dr. Evil

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Location: Richmond, California, United States

Thursday, June 23, 2005

And from the "Are You Fucking Serious" File:

Students offered online PE courses

MINNEAPOLIS, Minnesota (AP) -- It might not sound too strenuous, but some Minneapolis students are taking physical education courses online.

Jan Braaten, the district's lead teacher for physical education and health, said her staff was leery of the idea at first. "It's kind of an oxymoron to have online PE," she said.

But Braaten and others who developed the class are proud of their creation and say it's drawing interest from around the state and beyond. Online phys ed is being offered this summer as well.
Online learning offers a way for busy students to shoehorn the state-required academic courses and the electives they want into their schedules.

The course begins and ends with face-to-face meetings between student and teacher.

Those sessions include testing components of fitness such as strength, flexibility and endurance. Students also are provided with a heart monitor and record its readings and how hard they perceive they're working, along with other workout notes, in an activity journal. They e-mail their work for each weekly unit to teachers.

"It's sort of counterintuitive," concedes Judy McQuade, mother of student Chris Ransom.

"Snicker, snicker -- do I just click my mouse?"

This article came from here.

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